Skip to main content

Almost Veterinarians

     Anyone who has worked with animals or worked in a facility with animals knows that the general populace views you as "almost-as-good-as-a-veterinarian".  In some cases, you are even better because, while you may not have studied for years in school, you are free.  Friends will call you on the phone.  Neighbors will swing by with a quick question.  Random people will stop you in the grocery store.
     Here are some questions you might get:

"My dog's got a limp.  What do you think is causing it?"

"What is the best over-the-counter product for flea control?  I want something that is completely effective, totally safe, and under $5/month."

"Can you come over tonight and look at my dog?  I think she's dying." (That was a sad one.)

"Hey, I just noticed that my dog's tongue has a black spot on it.  He seems to be acting fine.  I don't know if that spot has always been there or if it just showed up.  Should I be worried?"

"My cat is having trouble breathing, and she hasn't been able to walk since this morning.  She looks really blue-colored, and I think she just went blind.  I don't want to take her to the vet.  Is there anything I can do for her at home?"

"Oh, yeah, by the way, any idea what might be causing (brace yourself if you are squeamish) the bloody green diarrhea in my dog?"  (Yeah.  That's exactly what you want to be asked in your favorite restaurant.)

"Is there any way that you could give my dog her vaccines?  I can't get her out of her pen, and my vet is too scared to go in there..."


       And, if you ask questions of some almost-vets, here are some answers you might get:

"Yep."

"Nope."

"Take it to your vet."

"Don't take it to THAT vet."

"Your dog ate what?!?  Okay, give me a minute while I look it up in my toxicology book."  (Dead silence for a moment)  "Oh, um, well...the good news is that if your dog was going to react he would already be dead by now..."

[The above quotes are based on true stories.]

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

More Snippets from Snow White Rose Red

    One of the shadows moved.   “Were you just going to chuck it in there with no thought for the poor folks on the other side?”   Flip’s voice drawled out.   It was a deep voice and it made my heart skip a beat.      He moved away from the trees and came to stand in front of me.   “Some hard-working fellow is plowing his field and then – whop!   Out of nowhere, a poisoned apple flies out and hits him upside the head.”   He clucked his tongue reproachfully.

A Short Story Break

via Pinterest     It has been a while since I penned a short story.  Usually it takes something like a "short story contest" to inspire me.  But I have noticed my writing skills improve with each contest so there is something to be said for writing short stories.      I say all this to lead into the fact that I am going to try another short story.  There is no contest looming on the horizon, but it has been so long that I think I am due to write a short piece.  Life cannot be entirely devoted to novel-length plots...      I am rolling around different ideas in my head.  There is no one to give me the first three words or a picture to base my story on.  There are no restrictions, no props, and no judges.      Methinks I will try something that is both epic and ordinary...something I have seen before.  After all, personal experience, great things, and the expression of the...

The Countdown: Eight Days

Eight days.  Do you know what that means?  Barely over a week.  Tomorrow will be one week from the announcement date. Are you excited? I am. So, today, I want to talk to those who wrote something for the contest, whether or not you entered it in the end. What made you start writing your story?  What was the first inkling of an idea that tickled your brain?  What was it that you liked about your premise?  As you wrote, did you have a favorite character or a favorite scene?  And are you glad you wrote it down?  Do you feel like you learned and grew in your ability as a writer as you tried out things for this contest? And, if your story isn't included in this year's Rooglewood anthology (either because you didn't submit it or because it didn't fit with the other four stories selected), what will you do with it?  Will you market it elsewhere?  Or will you lock it away in a drawer?